Amos blog

Hi guys! Im back with my blog again… Really felt like writing something to release some stuffs out of my heart for a long time. Im not good at writing stuffs n i tend to be blunt at times, so guys pls forgive me ya:) Was having lunch with the youths today…i enjoyed eating with these young ppl bcos i enjoyed interacting with them. Im able to noe them n understand them more n i enjoyed cracking some silly jokes with them.. make myself looked like a clown at times:) I noe at least my lunch time wont be boring. But at the same time i oso felt discouraged at certain times. Certain things they said abt me being old, shocked tat they noe tat i noe how to use MSN n some other stuffs… In fact i dun mind receiving these kind of comments from them, i try to have a bigger heart in hearing all these stuffs n i try to laugh it off… But as human being, no matter how big yur heart is, u will be affected at some point of time. I believe wat goes around comes around, n when u guys grows older like me, the next generation youths will say the same stuffs back to u n u will noe how it feels. I realised tat for this yr i mix around more with the youths. Maybe bcos i felt the need to interact with other grps of ppl in the church rather than the usual Matt n co. Jus wanna say this to the youths tat i love u all guys dearly n u guys r both precious to God n Me. But pls dun see me as someone different jus bcos im older than u guys. During my youth days, i respected my seniors alot bcos they r someone i looked up to in church n i hope u young ppl will do the same thing ya:) Love u all!!

Went to Vivo City today. Got myself a Zara sweater… something tat i’ve been wanting n looking for:) Was feeling rather dizzy for most of the day n i dunno y. At some point i felt like fainting n i could’nt stand properly while shoppin… i noe something’s wrong with me somewhere n my health wasn’t doing well lately:(

Tmr is gonna be another hectic day… haha but the good thing is tat my manager is not around for 1 wk so no "government" for me at least haha…

Another sunday passed by… but today is slightly different cos i dun get to play drums today hee… feels kinda abit weird standin among the congregation there worshipping. Maybe too long nva take a break liao la.. haha. Today my seatin place is different.. usually i sit on right side but today me n samuel decided to have a change n we sat on the left with the ’seniors’. Maybe the fengshui there is better hee..

Went to outram park for lunch with edgar+family, shawn+family n theo. We had ikan bilis yong tau foo… but the place as usual damn warm n stuffy…*phew*.. Today i received alot of gifts from my bro who send them back from France.. among the gifts are lotsa Zara shirts where he got it in France, Hard Rock cafe tees from Madrid, Berlin, Lisboa… n a drumsticks from Hard Rock cafe. But the best thing tat he got for me is a scarf.. this scarf is the champion league match btw Bordeaux n Liverpool.. he went to watch the match.. love it man. Gotta display it at the back of my car liao hahah.. n oso 1 Barcelona scarf too.

Gotta slp early tonite.. n prepare to fight the battle tomorrow:)

Rundown Paradise??…hmm… suddenly out of nowhere this word came into my mind. I tink i used this word during 1 of my chats with a fren. It is used to describe a small jungle near my pri sch where i used to catch spiders when i was young.. the jungle may look unfancy from the outside but when u talk a walk in, it’s like a paradise where there’s lotsa trees, birds n even a small little lake inside it… n its a little rundown. Tat jungle i guess still exist today.. but dunno wat its like inside now..

Spend my whole afternoon today doin nothin but surfin the net… quite wasteful for a wk end.. should have gone out but i guess being at home the whole day doin wat u wan is oso quite enjoyin took a nap and woke up abt 9+pm..abit dizzy when i woke up.. haha tmr no need to serve no need to play drums.. can just stand there n worship God which has been my passion. Another bz wk has passed jus like tat.. quite a fruitful wk in my work. Cleared up most of my work. Dunno y but feel tat i need to do my best n perform well for my job..doin my best at where i am now though it may not be the best place to work.. anyway i guess there’s no perfect place to work in this world. Everyday is about learning new things, learnin my mistakes, learnin to get along well with ppl, learnin not to screw up my work… complain less but look for new ways n ideas to improve my work:) i guess life will really be tough n draggy if u spend too much time complaining..

hahaha… tmr no need to wake up early for church.. can slowly drive liao..hee! nite everyone!!

Hi evryone! Its good to be back after i’ve gone missing for the past 5 mths after my reservist in taiwan.. 2006 has been a really messed up yr for me… i’m overloaded with my work, played badly n did not improved for my drums, did not spend proper time with my family, my own personal well-being was affected n lastly, was badly affected n hurt by ’someone’ whom i trusted, cared n liked so much… really shitty! My life took a bad turn durin aug 06 after i came back from reservist in taiwan… after which i failed to pick up myself again until only recently which i decided to move on… someone tat i liked n trusted so much turned away from me n went away with another person..but i cant do anything but accept the fact tat this world is like this.. where people r realistic n nothing is predictable. Since then i’ve decided not to dwell too much in r/s n stuffs…fearin tat the same things will happen again.

Wat ever tat has passed let it passed… i’ve gotta look forward n move ahead with life.. So Wats it gonna be for 2007? … to be a better son, a better friend, a better drummer, a better drum teacher for my 2 disciples, a better person n lastly to have a better job!

One of my closest uncle jus passed away early this morning after vomitting excessive blood. His death came as a shock to evryone in the family cos it happened so suddenly. I regard my uncle as my 2nd ‘Dad’ becos of the way he treats me and talk to me. I respect him alot bcos of the way he brought up and discipline his children. The last time I talked to him was this yrs CNY and he was still heathy then but could see that he’s getting skinny due to his illness.

I went to the wake this afternoon and the moment i reached there, I could see my aunt and both my cousin’s wives eyes filled with tears. I could feel for my aunt and my cousin’s wives bcos they r the one tat actually witness the whole process of his death. From the time he was in the toilet vomitting blood to the time he was taken to hospital and pronounced dead there. I was in time to see my uncle’s body b4 he was shifted into the coffin. I was saddened to see him lying there motionless and thinking back that i was still talking to him couple of mths ago. After tat i could do nothin but stand there n look at him.

My uncle’s eldest son rush back from China after hearing his death. Just now when he reached, the first thing he does was going up to my aunt and pad her on the cheek and hug her. Both of them jus weep silently though i could see tat my cousin was holding back his tears. Then he proceed on to take a look at his father. All the time while he was talking to us, he was actually tryin to put up a strong front. But at times when we r not talking, you could see tat his eyes began to turn red n weep again.

This saturday will be the day that the body will be cremated. It’s going to be very heavy for everyone on tat day. For those of you who r reading this blog, pls continue to keep us in prayer.

By the way, I jus wanna thks those who have prayed for us especially Aaron whom have shown great support and concern. Thks alot evryone!

feeling rather tired today. been tinking alot stuffs lately…tinking abt my job, my ministry, my drums, my family, friends etc.. alot of things jus came into my mind. dunno why but jus felt tat i really need a breakthrough in many things esp my drums. been playing quite off-form during service lately. i’m tryin to find out wats my problem n the root cause. have been analyzing where my drummin problems lies. anyway its like a season where at certain point of time u r playin really well n then after a while u played really badly. but its oso a time where u learn from mistakes n u move on another stage ahead. ..family goin thru some rough patch recently, but i noe tat this period of tough times will be over soon cos God is in control.. i pray tat God will oso keep me n sustain me during this period of time.

this morning service is amazing… God’s  presence is so strong in the house, He’s moving so strong n powerful today. i believe many have really enjoyed worship today. was having a bad diarrhoea for past few days, but was detemined to serve God today despite the discomfort… make a few slight mistakes here n there in the beginning of the worship, but press on n after a while God just took over the service n everything jus moved so powerfully. the sermon by ps. phil stevenson though is simple but it really send out a strong msg to the ppl including myself. its nva easy to forgive someone but when u tink of how God forgave us of our wrong doings, our sins then u realize how much more we should forgive others. its not easy but it is a process tat takes time, alot of prayers. this week gonna be a very bz week… jus endure this week then i can enjoy my long holiday liao..

finally back to work after 1 week of reservist… heard a comment from a colleague from work tat they read my blog n their hair "stand"…dunno izzit good or bad comment. maybe bcos i wrote many christian stuffs. anyway i’m a christian so obviously i will write christian stuffs…if ppl dun feel comfortable with wat i wrote then so be it. I can’t please everyone. I noe tat ever since tat day when i decided to become a christian, i will bound to face critisism, sarcasm n finger pointing from other ppl because i used to do tat to christian when i was young. I thank God for this life tat He gave me.

went for my drivin test early this morning..during the warm-up test, i mount curb 2 times n hit the poles during parking…really feeling nervous man. But during the actual test, things went very smoothly during the circuit until i went into the road. Usually drivin on the road is my strong points but dunno y today it turns out to be my weakest…i got overtaken by 2 cars during the stop junction n was penalise for not makin good judgment…but i blame myself for not havin enough prac b4 the test. At the end of the day, i review my test report n i realise tat i could actually have passed the test if not for those mistakes tat i dun usually commit. i believe the next time i will pass. Once i got i pay, i’m gonna book more prac to prepare myself better. 4 more days to pay day… this time really have to manage my finance well. alot of things to commit…mission fees, drivin fees etc. i have a good rest at home. i deserve a good rest. Thank God its friday tmr. Looking forward to music prac tmr nite…gonna leave early for music prac tmr…have been very late for music prac for past 1-2mths coz of work…sucks man really. Jus wanna give God the glory for the events today. Amen!

finally tomorrow on leave, but morning will be taking my drivin test….feeling rather abit nervous now. anyway i jus do my best n God will do the rest. not a good timing to take the test coz the test is 8.25am…alot of obstacles…bus lane, heavy traffic (esp at Ubi). tink none of the ppl around me tink i will pass…haha…anyway miracles do happen. i’m aiming to pass at the very 1st try. Not feeling very well today. was feeling dizzy when i woke up. the dizziness lasted the whole day, every time i turn my head i could feel tat the things around me r moving…could’nt stand straight at times. tmr plans will be staying at home resting…listening to worship music, prac my drums, spend some personal time alone, do some personal reflection…haven been doin my own stuffs for the pass 1-2mths due to heavy workload. trying to strike out a balance btw work n church…feel tat my job has taken a big part of me…its affecting me in certain ways. i believe God will make me strong.